What Is This Thing Called "Renz"

There once was a puppy named Annie (as in Little Orphan) and as it happens she was a slut puppy. She crawled under the fence and got herself in a family way with the neighbors' dog. Before long there were seven little puppies - four that looked very similar whom the Shell children decided to call George and the three Georgettes, one that looked a bit like his papa and so was christened J.J. (Jackson Junior - later to be shorted to simply Jake) and the twins - a boy and girl who looked more like their mama - these were given the "Spanish" names of the two older Shell kids who were taking a foreign language in school and were thenceforth referred to as Lorenzo and Lolita.

Now as often happens with names, these were tinkered with over time and gradually were abbreviated to Renzo and Lita. Sadly the time came where all the puppies went to new homes with the exception of J.J. who was chosen to stay with his birth family.

Now as it happened the oldest Shell child (moi) was also a "Junior." His family was greatly influenced by the residents of the White House in 1963. President Kennedy's son was also a "Junior" and they called him "John-John." For many, many years the eldest Shell child was referred to as Lar-Lar (something the Nilles girls will attest to on Facebook).

However, as he got older, he no longer appreciated this nickname which seemed more appropriate to a boy in short pants. How appropriate then that his younger sister, noting the absence of the puppies from the home, transferred the one pups name to her elder brother as his new nickname.

That, folks, is how Renzo became family nickname. This name, too, was further shortened to the simple Renz. That is the answer to the question: what is this thing called "Renz." Essentially, it is the middle letters of LoRENZo. Besides, "Renz In The Woods" sounds so much more interesting than "Larry In The Woods," don't you think?