Florence Nightingale is known the world round as a founder of the modern concept of nursing. What is less known is that from 1857 on she essentially took to her bed and stayed there. There are many theories and speculations about why she did this. It is merely a spring board for my post tonight.
I have had a very strange day. Once again I have effectively taken to my bed for the bulk of the day and only now in the evening am I feeling sufficiently rested to tackle some chores and blog. At least three different times during the day I felt so exhausted I simply curled up in bed and fell back asleep with the dogs.
At first glance one might simply assume that this is depression. I know depression and I don't believe that is the case. Lately it seems I simply cannot get enough rest. However, my lack of a firm diagnosis along with cultural norms regarding sloth and laziness tend to make me a bit hard on myself. I tend to question what is occurring instead of simply listening to my body and being satisfied.
My arthritic condition, I should just start calling it my "rheumatism," is aggravating and the likely culprit for my lack of energy. Rest and sleep would be therapeutic then, so why do I feel so guilty and out of sorts?
It is so hard to recognize what it is we need in this world and then harder still to allow ourselves to have what we need. We are constantly told what we are supposed to be and what we are supposed to do and how we are supposed to do it. I am surrounded by a number of individuals who seem incapable of just sitting and being still. They never seem to stop moving. One of them uses the term "lazy" for every moment that she does manage to sit and just relax.
Next to them I am a downright slothful libertine. I just don't see the point in all that busy-ness. It seems like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. Better to simply our lives and just be. If that means sleeping when one feels sleepy or letting the dirty dishes pile up, so be it.
I have had a very strange day. Once again I have effectively taken to my bed for the bulk of the day and only now in the evening am I feeling sufficiently rested to tackle some chores and blog. At least three different times during the day I felt so exhausted I simply curled up in bed and fell back asleep with the dogs.
At first glance one might simply assume that this is depression. I know depression and I don't believe that is the case. Lately it seems I simply cannot get enough rest. However, my lack of a firm diagnosis along with cultural norms regarding sloth and laziness tend to make me a bit hard on myself. I tend to question what is occurring instead of simply listening to my body and being satisfied.
My arthritic condition, I should just start calling it my "rheumatism," is aggravating and the likely culprit for my lack of energy. Rest and sleep would be therapeutic then, so why do I feel so guilty and out of sorts?
It is so hard to recognize what it is we need in this world and then harder still to allow ourselves to have what we need. We are constantly told what we are supposed to be and what we are supposed to do and how we are supposed to do it. I am surrounded by a number of individuals who seem incapable of just sitting and being still. They never seem to stop moving. One of them uses the term "lazy" for every moment that she does manage to sit and just relax.
Next to them I am a downright slothful libertine. I just don't see the point in all that busy-ness. It seems like rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic. Better to simply our lives and just be. If that means sleeping when one feels sleepy or letting the dirty dishes pile up, so be it.
1 comment:
Consistent with what you were saying, I have had similar experiences. I think it's connected to experiencing a level of pain. I feel pain can drain you of energy. This was especially true prior to my hip surgery. I might feel energized and go grocery shopping. Half way through, the pain would build up, and I might have to sit down for a few minutes before continuing. By the time I would get home, it was all I could do to unload the perishables, and drag my ass to the bed.
The hip surgery corrected a big source of my pain. However, issues continued to involve my lower back. For the last month, I have been seeing a chiropractor and the reduction in back associated pain has been nothing short of a miracle.
I continue to start out energized, but now I can do so much more and do not always need to have that nap.
Thanks for your recommendation to seek help from a chiropractic professional.
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