There was a piece on public radio this past week that's been bouncing around in my head I guess. It seems that the actual location of the Four Corners Monument is in reality about 1200 feet off the mark due to imperfect surveying techniques at the time the borders were determined. Four Corners Monument is the only place in the United States were you can be in four states at one time - Colorado, Utah, Arizona and New Mexico. Getting your photo taken being in all four states simulaneously is a popular tourist pic as demonstrated in the image above.
This concept has resonated with me as I have continued to post comments at the Stand Firm In Faith blog. For those of you unfamiliar with this blog, it is the home to very conservative - some are rabidly conservative - Anglicans and more often than not the running commentary runs to the extreme. Friends of mine from other blogs don't understand why I would do this. They see the folks at SFIF as the "enemy." I have been gently criticized for posting comments there and warned about their "evil ways." Sadly I believe that that is what many of the folks at SFIF would say to one of their regulars posting at OCICBW, for example.
However, when I choose to comment at SFIF I am aware of the overall bent of the place I am visiting. I don't believe there is anything to be gained by attempting to change minds with a head on approach. That seems to lead to furious typing and name calling and little is changed in the end. Instead I try to put forth my presence into the dialogue. There have been a few recent posts where the homophobia was running rather thickly. Yet at the heart of what was being discussed, I could still find common ground and very politely put forth my gay opinion while emphasizing where I was concurring.
What I am discovering is that I no longer want to be part of a cyber shouting match. I have never been comfortable arguing over abstract topics or politics with my friends and acquaintances face to face--why on Earth did I think I would end up enjoying it on line?
What is worse is that on line, it is so much easier to comparmentalize people--so much easier to just fall onto one side or the other and dig in your heels. At least when I fall into arguing over a movie with my friend Pam, we have this deep, multi-layered friendship to fall back on to get back to grace when we are exhausted from our battle of words. These cyber connections are much more tenuous. We are either spewing forth our wrath at nameless, faceless "trolls" or end up in a snit with a cyber friend for which we have the shallowest of connections. Recovering grace is much more challenging, therefore, in an on-line world.
Finally, it is so important to remember that we can be in many places at once. Much as we try to divide up the country into red and blue - the states are purple, the counties are purple, the towns are purple, the people are purple. I cannot tow any single party line. I am too complex for that and I must remind myself that that is also true of everyone I meet on line. That individual caught up in his/her rant about what they perceive is the "gay agenda," they are speaking from the heart out of fear or anger or both. If I reject them outright based on that one moment in their complex lives, then hate wins. It is not always easy, but I try to put forward a face of love. Jesus taught me that - it's easy to love your friends and doesn't win you much in the end - try loving your enemies, you just might find that there's room for friendship there. Peace.
This concept has resonated with me as I have continued to post comments at the Stand Firm In Faith blog. For those of you unfamiliar with this blog, it is the home to very conservative - some are rabidly conservative - Anglicans and more often than not the running commentary runs to the extreme. Friends of mine from other blogs don't understand why I would do this. They see the folks at SFIF as the "enemy." I have been gently criticized for posting comments there and warned about their "evil ways." Sadly I believe that that is what many of the folks at SFIF would say to one of their regulars posting at OCICBW, for example.
However, when I choose to comment at SFIF I am aware of the overall bent of the place I am visiting. I don't believe there is anything to be gained by attempting to change minds with a head on approach. That seems to lead to furious typing and name calling and little is changed in the end. Instead I try to put forth my presence into the dialogue. There have been a few recent posts where the homophobia was running rather thickly. Yet at the heart of what was being discussed, I could still find common ground and very politely put forth my gay opinion while emphasizing where I was concurring.
What I am discovering is that I no longer want to be part of a cyber shouting match. I have never been comfortable arguing over abstract topics or politics with my friends and acquaintances face to face--why on Earth did I think I would end up enjoying it on line?
What is worse is that on line, it is so much easier to comparmentalize people--so much easier to just fall onto one side or the other and dig in your heels. At least when I fall into arguing over a movie with my friend Pam, we have this deep, multi-layered friendship to fall back on to get back to grace when we are exhausted from our battle of words. These cyber connections are much more tenuous. We are either spewing forth our wrath at nameless, faceless "trolls" or end up in a snit with a cyber friend for which we have the shallowest of connections. Recovering grace is much more challenging, therefore, in an on-line world.
Finally, it is so important to remember that we can be in many places at once. Much as we try to divide up the country into red and blue - the states are purple, the counties are purple, the towns are purple, the people are purple. I cannot tow any single party line. I am too complex for that and I must remind myself that that is also true of everyone I meet on line. That individual caught up in his/her rant about what they perceive is the "gay agenda," they are speaking from the heart out of fear or anger or both. If I reject them outright based on that one moment in their complex lives, then hate wins. It is not always easy, but I try to put forward a face of love. Jesus taught me that - it's easy to love your friends and doesn't win you much in the end - try loving your enemies, you just might find that there's room for friendship there. Peace.
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