Late last week I saw the Facebook update from Amnesty International that included this picture. I proceeded to switch my profile picture on Facebook as well as my picture on Twitter, and included an appropriate Tweet and Status Update to try and get the word out.
I remember the days following the election, where folks had changed their pics to green and we were following closely what was occurring in Iran. The viral video of the woman who was shot and died.
I knew I would blog about Human Rights today. In addition, I posted a number of YouTube video links of appropriate music (e.g., Peter Gabriel singing "Biko," the Neville Brothers singing about Rosa Parks, et al.). I posted information about movies. I linked to a couple news updates from CNN.
#Iran never even made it into the top list of topics on Twitter today. There were scattered folks on Facebook putting up info related to the Human Rights theme. I received a few "Likes." Overall there was very little.
Ironically there's been more posting and commenting on the Facebook changes this week. Perhaps in our right-here-in-front-of-us lives that IS more important. Iran is abstract. Iran is far away. The revolution isn't happening rapidly enough to hold our attention so we have moved on. The same could be true of Haiti.
I should stop here and clearly state that I am not passing judgment on us collectively. I felt motivated to be clever today. It's not clear to me how my actions helped the people of Iran what bit. It just has me thinking, that's all.
Once again I am pondering what all this cyber stuff really means. Barak Obama's campaign used the internet very successfully, building on Howard Dean's success from the previous election cycle. However, I am feeling of late rather used and manipulated in hind site.
I fear that all this chatter on blogs, social networks, web site commentary, etc. is merely adding to the growing isolation the sociologists are seeing or that it is creating the illusion of participation in our democracy. For example, I have contacted my Senators and my representative many more times in recent years via their web pages and e-mail. Yet every response I receive back, via e-mail, is merely a canned response to the generic topic at hand. More often than not these "responses" reveal that the senders clearly did not read the body of my message.
We all furiously post status updates, sign cyber petitions, hit the "Like" buttons, bitch and complain and feel like we've accomplished a lot when we are disturbed by political events. We don't seem terribly moved to get out of our houses though and actually protest. Last weekend I drove past the post office where protesters have been picketing the war for years now - there was one lonely guy, bundled up against the cold, carrying a simple sign that said, "Peace Now."
I assume that in my self induced hermit state I am unique. However, when I finally do manage to connect with friends - face to face over coffee, for example - I discover that most of us are just sitting at home over work, not seeing anyone.
In addition to my personal drama over unfriending a bunch of non-participatory Facebook "Friends," I listened to a piece on NPR that focused on the difficulties people are finding unraveling these "connections." One of my high school classmates up and announced she is leaving Facebook this week. Privately she acknowledged that there was too much nastiness occurring, yet she felt it was easier to pull the plug then try to negotiate unfriending or blocking. My good friend Lisa (who has always felt there was something very wrong about Facebook etc.) reported to me on the phone that two people at her work did just the same thing - pulled the plug.
I called the one friend who had questioned being unfriended. I commented to her about the recent nasty e-mail I had received. She wasn't surprised. Apparently she's been having discussion with some of my other local friends who got purged. According to her, they are in a snit, making statements like, "Well, if he just wants to cut himself off from us..."
None of the locals who were unfriended have called me in months. None of the locals who were unfriended have sent me e-mails, commented on my blog, or even connected with me on Facebook. By some strange stretch of the imagination, they have come to the conclusion that being able to follow little cyber postings as I interact with others on Facebook constitutes on ongoing friendship between us--a friendship that is now in jeopardy because if have unfriended them.
Does this frighten you even a little bit? I don't believe Facebook is to blame. Clearly there is a major shift occurring in how we live our lives. New houses our constructed in gated communities with the garage up front with the house hiding behind. Our public space revolved around consumerism and spending money, yet the internet makes it simpler to shop from home. Our televisions have gotten bigger with clearer pictures - why bother going to the movies any more? The vast majority of people walking down the street either have a cell phone/blue tooth strapped to their ear or are wearing ear buds listening to their iPods. As I said, everyone seems to be disconnected, doing the revolving work/home/sleep/work/home/sleep routine.
Facebook came along and offered up an apparent solution to this growing isolation. I have indeed reconnected with old school mates and friends who now live all over the country. I have made new friends who live all around the globe. However, this has made it easier for me to neglect my local friends. It has made the physical isolation more tempting.
I really don't know what the answer is.
I remember the days following the election, where folks had changed their pics to green and we were following closely what was occurring in Iran. The viral video of the woman who was shot and died.
I knew I would blog about Human Rights today. In addition, I posted a number of YouTube video links of appropriate music (e.g., Peter Gabriel singing "Biko," the Neville Brothers singing about Rosa Parks, et al.). I posted information about movies. I linked to a couple news updates from CNN.
#Iran never even made it into the top list of topics on Twitter today. There were scattered folks on Facebook putting up info related to the Human Rights theme. I received a few "Likes." Overall there was very little.
Ironically there's been more posting and commenting on the Facebook changes this week. Perhaps in our right-here-in-front-of-us lives that IS more important. Iran is abstract. Iran is far away. The revolution isn't happening rapidly enough to hold our attention so we have moved on. The same could be true of Haiti.
I should stop here and clearly state that I am not passing judgment on us collectively. I felt motivated to be clever today. It's not clear to me how my actions helped the people of Iran what bit. It just has me thinking, that's all.
Once again I am pondering what all this cyber stuff really means. Barak Obama's campaign used the internet very successfully, building on Howard Dean's success from the previous election cycle. However, I am feeling of late rather used and manipulated in hind site.
I fear that all this chatter on blogs, social networks, web site commentary, etc. is merely adding to the growing isolation the sociologists are seeing or that it is creating the illusion of participation in our democracy. For example, I have contacted my Senators and my representative many more times in recent years via their web pages and e-mail. Yet every response I receive back, via e-mail, is merely a canned response to the generic topic at hand. More often than not these "responses" reveal that the senders clearly did not read the body of my message.
We all furiously post status updates, sign cyber petitions, hit the "Like" buttons, bitch and complain and feel like we've accomplished a lot when we are disturbed by political events. We don't seem terribly moved to get out of our houses though and actually protest. Last weekend I drove past the post office where protesters have been picketing the war for years now - there was one lonely guy, bundled up against the cold, carrying a simple sign that said, "Peace Now."
I assume that in my self induced hermit state I am unique. However, when I finally do manage to connect with friends - face to face over coffee, for example - I discover that most of us are just sitting at home over work, not seeing anyone.
In addition to my personal drama over unfriending a bunch of non-participatory Facebook "Friends," I listened to a piece on NPR that focused on the difficulties people are finding unraveling these "connections." One of my high school classmates up and announced she is leaving Facebook this week. Privately she acknowledged that there was too much nastiness occurring, yet she felt it was easier to pull the plug then try to negotiate unfriending or blocking. My good friend Lisa (who has always felt there was something very wrong about Facebook etc.) reported to me on the phone that two people at her work did just the same thing - pulled the plug.
I called the one friend who had questioned being unfriended. I commented to her about the recent nasty e-mail I had received. She wasn't surprised. Apparently she's been having discussion with some of my other local friends who got purged. According to her, they are in a snit, making statements like, "Well, if he just wants to cut himself off from us..."
None of the locals who were unfriended have called me in months. None of the locals who were unfriended have sent me e-mails, commented on my blog, or even connected with me on Facebook. By some strange stretch of the imagination, they have come to the conclusion that being able to follow little cyber postings as I interact with others on Facebook constitutes on ongoing friendship between us--a friendship that is now in jeopardy because if have unfriended them.
Does this frighten you even a little bit? I don't believe Facebook is to blame. Clearly there is a major shift occurring in how we live our lives. New houses our constructed in gated communities with the garage up front with the house hiding behind. Our public space revolved around consumerism and spending money, yet the internet makes it simpler to shop from home. Our televisions have gotten bigger with clearer pictures - why bother going to the movies any more? The vast majority of people walking down the street either have a cell phone/blue tooth strapped to their ear or are wearing ear buds listening to their iPods. As I said, everyone seems to be disconnected, doing the revolving work/home/sleep/work/home/sleep routine.
Facebook came along and offered up an apparent solution to this growing isolation. I have indeed reconnected with old school mates and friends who now live all over the country. I have made new friends who live all around the globe. However, this has made it easier for me to neglect my local friends. It has made the physical isolation more tempting.
I really don't know what the answer is.
5 comments:
One answer, obviously, is to unplug. Force yourself to connect with people face to face.
I am on Facebook only because I was invited to do so, but I never "use" it. I prefer to write on my own on-line journal rather than the generic Facebook tool; I don't really feel safe on it.
I had better connections with my friends when I had one landline phone available to me, and the US post office. And yet, every year there are new "must-have" technologies....for personal and business use. We spend more time manipulating buttons and touch-screens than developing our sensitivity and empathy. Maybe that's why I feel so much more kinship with the dogs in the shelter where I volunteer.
We CAN live more purely, with a minimum of hardware.
I kind of understand what you are saying. I think we all have "friends" on Facebook with whom we rarely, if ever, communicate. However, their empty relationship with me has allowed other people, with whom I've lost contact with, to reconnect with me.
Literally from elementary school forward, I have had to disconnect with some very wonderful people. Some were from schools, and some were from jobs where they or I moved on. Facebook has provided a mechanism whereby we have once again connectted to share communications.
To some Facebook users, it is a forum where they can play Mafia, or Farmland, or any number of other games. They can create or merely test their wits on quizzes and tests. I myself do not. Sometimes I comment on the postings of others; sometimes to support and others to criticize.
I understand that some are with noses out of joint on having been de-friended. I recall a Seinfeld episode that focused on being added to or removed from a "speed-dial" list. I also know, as I posted the other day, that none of our family mambers have posted anything to our family blog since December of last year.
I liked our family blog as I could always go backwards a month or a year to re-visit some posting. We dump things on Facebook and assume that all who need to see it will. That's wrong. Ofter it doesn't happen.
I love seeing what you and your friends are up to. Also I noticed that I have a phone book of family and friends. Many of the listings there are not used for years at a time. However, when I need it, it is there.
Love you son, keep on posting, and waving the liberal flag. People do need to begin picturing how the lives of others actually interact with their own.
I took a long time to join Facebook and I'm now pleased I did. I have "unfriended" one person who posted total trivia "Debbie got those curtains she bid for on e-bay" - really, who cares - but thus far it has been very positive, especially in terms of the solidarity I found on the Facebook group established to support my vocation.
I do take your point about how what we post reflects our priorities but I don't know what the answer is.
I'd come and visit if I lived close enough!
While I see the utility of social networking sites in certain situations, this is precisely why I refuse to participate. Facebook contributes more to the degredation of socialization skills than the good it does "connecting" people. While the wonders of the internet are vast, nothing can or should replace socialization, old fashioned communication, and friendships.
Think about it. At one time we met face-to-face at church, townhall, or other social gatherings. Then we moved on to letter writing and phone calls. The phone went mobile and the internet was upon us. Then, we communicated by email because we were "too busy" to talk on the phone. Now, with Facebook, verbal & written communication skills have all but gone by the wayside. We are "too busy" to email now.
All of this technology is wonderful as long as other things don't go by the wayside. Socialization certainly has, and that's a shame. We all have massive TV's, Netflicks, videogames, and the like. Most people go home from work and plop on the couch and sit there. They don't know their neighbors or neighborhoods, are not active in their community, nor do they care. We've isolated ourselves in our comfortable couches and are mezmerized by endless, shallow reality TV shows and obsess over what electronic gadget is stuck in our ear on any given day. It's cozy, it's safe, and you don't have to talk to anyone. Perfect.
For all of my complaints, I walk the walk as best I can. All of my TV's are at least 15 years old, I dropped my cable, I do not subscribe to Netflicks, and certainly do not have a videogame in the house. I know each and every one of my neighbors and many more as I am an active participant in my neighborhood association. I am active in many other groups, environmental and political, in our community. I read, garden and am very active with outdoor activities.
I will continue to foster my friendships by phone, email, and in person. I never have had a lot of friends, but the ones I have are good ones (including you, Larry!). I would rather have a handful of good and true friends with whom I communicate with by phone or in person, than spend my days with my panties in a snit because some person has "unfriended" me. (To feel this way about a family member is unthinkable!) We should all be reminded to take a deep breath and return to fostering true and real friendships, rather than waste precious time and energy on cyberfriends/old school buddies whom you will never meet and challenge the definition of a true "friend".
Lisa in MN
I have no local friends, ...they all live 30-2500 miles away. I have no cell phone or i-pod. I drive an increasingly rusty 1991 Chevy Caprice 9C1.
Ever since Granny went to live in a home in a home I have withdrawn from the outside world to the point of having my mail stopped twice for non-pickup, to not being able to show sympathy to my Grandmother over my Fathers death, ..without totally losing it.
Without the net I would have already ceased to exist.
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